As a young child of the ‘70s,

I was raised with the idea that being a respectful child meant being "seen and not heard," in the presence of adults. I also heard "because I said so" or "because I'm the parent" in my household (and my friend's homes as well). The impact of these phrases often made me feel invisible or that what I had to say wasn't valued. As a parent, I have intentionally changed the narrative that being polite or mannerable as a child means acquiescing to the will of the adult. Now, I give my children space to speak their truth and honoring their thoughts and opinions (even if they differ from mine) has meant opportunities to boost their self-confidence and self-advocacy. If we don't give our children spaces to use their voices in the safety of our homes, how will they be able to use them in a world that is not always just and kind? If we want to raise the next generation of children differently from how our parents raised us, how we talk (and listen) to them is a great place to start.

It’s important to change the narrative and have these conversations with the next generation of BIPOC kids to promote a sense of belonging, positive self-image and empowerment.

By stopping the use of harmful phrases, we can create a safe and inclusive environment where Black and Brown children can thrive and feel proud of their identity. This approach can also contribute to breaking down systemic racism and promoting equity in society.

Family Meeting

How We Talk to Our BIPOC Kids

Dr. Traci Baxley

a cultural and race identity coach, creator of Social Justice Parenting and mom-of-five from Florida

As BIPOC Parents, We Need to Talk About Generational Trauma

How do you break centuries' worth of conditioning and behavior?

Dr. Isha Metzger

a psychologist and director of The EMPOWER Lab

A Kid-Friendly Glossary

5 Things We Need to Stop Telling Our Black Children

Because words matter.

Black, Indigenous, and Person of Color.

A verbal or non-verbal action based on stereotypes of a race, gender or any marginalized group.

A person who actively supports and fights for the rights of a marginalized group.

The practice of forcing someone to work and obey without a choice. (We say 'enslaved person' as opposed to 'slave' to separate someone's identity from their dehumanizing bondage)

The idea that specific institutions have longstanding policies and traditions that hinder marginalized groups.