We speak to the distinctly British phenomenon that is Kurupt FM
How do you explain People Just Do Nothing to the uninitiated? It’s no easy task, but we’ll try and sum it up in a sentence, so here goes: it’s a mockumentary TV show that features people pretending to be a garage station called Kurupt FM -- which is also the name of a real radio station that they appeared on in their youth -- and the success of the show has led to them headlining very-much-real shows and, ultimately, signing a real record label with XL Records. Does that make sense? We understand if it doesn’t.
You know when CDs have got the parental advisory? We’re actually working on some new cautions for the tape, epilepsy, could cause diarrhea, people be warned.
The crew behind the show consists of Allan Mustafa who plays MC Grindah -- a kind of Garage Kenny Powers figure crossed with David Brent -- alongside Beats (Hugo Chegwin), Asim Chaudhry (Chabuddy G) and Steves (Steve Stamp). This forms the hub of the show, with all of them acting as writers. The group came together organically, with Stamp growing up with Chegwin, Chegwin becoming friends with Chaudhry in college and being introduced to Mustafa through a mutual friend. Stamp and Chegwin used to run a fake garage crew called Blazin’ Unit in the Myspace era that Stamp surmised as "an embarrassingly shit version of what we do now," in an interview with Vice. Meanwhile Mustafa rapped on a real pirate radio station called Kurupt FM, although he never got round to making music because, in the same interview, he said "we just watched The Office a lot and smoked weed."
It’s more of a vibe, you can’t really describe it; it’s like a color, it’s an aura, it’s a Chi.
People Just Do Nothing started out as a YouTube series, with Stamp saying those episodes were “loosely planned and heavily improvised” in a BBC blog post. Stamp laid out how those first shows happened, saying “What I proposed was that we put our talents together and work towards developing something that we could all be proud of. Spending our time doing something that we actually wanted to do, even if there was no immediate reward.”
A lot of MCs are fans of mine because I’ve subconsciously inspired them.
[Our video is] a bit of a conceptual one where we dress up in our best clothes and go down to an estate that we don’t even live on and start MCing at the camera.
After five webisodes however, there was a reward in the form of production company Roughcut TV discovering their show. The prod uction company was run by Ash Atalla, who produced the UK version of The Office, which was reason enough for the group to get in touch. The pilot they created gained enough buzz and eventually became a four-part series on BBC Three. The show has gone from cult watch to as mainstream as can be for a show that’s on the web component of the BBC and it’s since gone on to land a deal with Netflix, which helps exponentially with viewership outside of the UK. But its crowning moment was earlier this year, when they won a BAFTA for best scripted comedy. In the backstage interview, they were asked about whether the show would lose its edge now it’s been recognized by a traditional stage like the BAFTA, to which Mustafa answered: “This is in us. We grew up with pirate radio, we were on pirate radio as MCs and DJs, you can never lose that.”
And this authenticity is why the show has been such a hit with musicians. When we spoke to Neil, the group’s manager, about why this was the case, he said it works as nostalgia for artists, as they all remember being at that stage of their career when their ambitions and grandeur far outweighed their accomplishments. So it’s no surprise that it’s gained fans in the likes of Big Narstie and Mike Skinner, both of whom were part of the two night residency at the Roundhouse in North London, or when Kelela tweets about being star struck after bumping into Mustafa and Stamp. That a show gains popularity and becomes more well known is pretty standard usually, but the fame attained by the success of People Just Do Nothing had led to a unique -- and bizarre -- scenario where they can now headline a residency at a prestigious venue such as the Camden Roundhouse (for reference, the last act this writer saw at that venue was D’Angelo).
Half the interest of seeing Kurupt FM perform live is seeing how this interaction between audience and the stars works in real life. The closest comparison is professional wrestling, where everyone is in on the fact that it’s pre-planned but are along for the ride nonetheless. At this show, people clearly genuinely like the music being played and there is a very earnest like for Kurupt FM’s own songs, despite the fact that one of the songs was the long-running butt of a joke throughout the third season. On one hand, it is weird to see the crowd react to “Heart Monitor Riddim” with more energy than they react to Pay As You Go Cartel’s “Know We,” but on the other hand, the mere fact that the audience were exposed to a song on a weekly basis would help build familiarity, even though it was mostly lampooned when it did appear. So while we’re not sure this was part of a masterplan, it’s clear that the group are being very clever about how they handle themselves and why it somehow makes perfect sense that they’d release an album now, complete with a bunch of interviews done completely in character -- including us, and you can read it below.
How are you guys feeling about this event tonight?
It’s gonna be sick, we’re excited. It’s the second night, the big finale and that. We’ve got a lot of surprises in store.
And how was the first night?
It was really good. I only made like three mistakes.
I made no mistakes because I don’t make mistakes.
I got a dead arm after it, but it was worth it.
Steve made about eight mistakes but you expect that from Steves dyaknowwhatImean?
I lost my hat in the crowd as well, had to go looking for it afterwards for quite a long time took me about three hours to track down the person.
You can smell the hat though, so just follow the scent.
You had to swap them for his trousers in the end, went home just in your boxers didn’t you in the end.
What’s the hat smell like?
Piss and skunk.
You know like an old pillow? You know how old people smell of like piss a little bit? it’s like that but also a lot of skunk as well.
And wet dog as well.
Strangely erotic.
Not for me.
Yeah, me neither.
And why have you decided to release an album now?
It’s not even us deciding, dyaknowwhatImean? It’s the people deciding just because they love us so much.
And, also, we’ve been trying to do it for 10 years.
No, I never wanted to before.
Yeah, now is the perfect time because we’re gonna bring CDs back.
Exactly. I’ve decided that this is the time to bring CDs back.
Yeah, because all the internet’s confusing and that.
Yeah, that’s gonna blow over.
So is there no digital downloads?
There will be just because you have to, dyaknowhatImean?
It’s part of the law of releasing music now.
We might do a few MiniDiscs, bring that back.
And then also some limited edition vinyls as well.
The MiniDiscs are Japan-only.
What’s the thinking behind the album?
There is none. We just black out and start MCing.
Grindah had the vision.
Yeah, I had the vision because, I just kept thinking about this set we done one time. And it’s like the best set that we’ve ever done, it was back in ‘11. We were thinking it was better as a legend, dyaknowhatImean? But then it resurfaced again so why not let the people have what they want, dyaknowhatImean?
You said you didn’t wanna release it because you didn’t have the 100-bar verse on it.
It did, this is the edited version. There was a 1,000-bar verse, it’s not even a 100-bar verse, but it’s too much for the people, you’d have to put an epilepsy warning and all that. You don’t remember, but you blacked out that day, that’s why you keep telling me it never happened.
You know when CDs have got the parental advisory? We’re actually working on some new cautions for the tape, like Grindah said epilepsy, could cause diarrhea, so just a few things, people be warned, this is something that is very, very pungent sound.
Why haven’t you made more albums before this?
Because it’d be unfair if we constantly released music.
We’ve got our own radio station already, other MC’s ain’t got that, dyaknowhatImean?
So we basically do an album a day anyway.
Exactly, every set we do is an album.
We’ve actually got a box just with loads of tapes of our albums that we’ve done before.
Exactly. And by albums he means mixes but to us they’re an album. But that’s where albums came from, they originated with the mix.
Yeah, in Jamaica.
How would you describe Kurupt FM?
It’s a radio station--
A powerhouse.
Oh, a powerhouse, yeah.
It’s more of a vibe, you can’t really describe it; it’s like a color, it’s an aura, it’s a Chi.
But it is a radio station.
How have you added your own twist to the songs?
Just like changing your voice every few bars. That’s another thing that a lot of MCs get wrong, they keep the same voice throughout the whole track, dyaknowhatImean? And we adapt and change, change and adapt, see what I did there?
Flipped it.
A lot of DJs on the compilation would do a lot of nice clean mixing, but I’ve chosen to not do that on this compilation and just do more slightly clangy--
Rustic. Rustic mixing.
Arty, Avant-garde.
And sorta spinning out and tryna catch the beat and not-quite-getting-it sorta mixes.
Off your head more like than off the cuff (laughs). Because he’s always doing drugs.
He does drugs a lot. He’s got a drug problem.
But in a fun way.
Not in a dark way. He might piss himself every now and then.
It’s only a problem to other people.
Exactly.
We watch him choke on his own vomit sometimes.
So then you have to go down his throat and get it out sometimes.
The first thing I have to do if there’s like a new friend that I meet or whatever is teach them how to put me into the recovery position. It’s just a thing that is necessary to hang around me.
We know he’s choking because he does these weird sexy gagging noises, that kinda ‘aggggghhhh gggghhhh.’
They’re not sexy.
Yeah they’re not sexy.
Not everything has to be about sex.
That’s what I’m saying, he’s actually just choking on his own vomit. It’s funny.
Sometimes he does it on purpose to like throw us off and that. D’you remember that time you started pissing yourself and you went ‘got ya’ and then you went ‘but I did actually piss myself.’
Nah, I was pretty fucked.
Sometimes when you do things that you don’t mean to you can say jokes afterwards as well.
Exactly, it’s like a reset button.
I love jokes.
Anyway back to the album, I digest.
Is this the biggest show you’ve ever done?
I mean we’ve sold out Brixton academy.
We’ve done Rowans bar at Bedford roundabout.
What do you mean by biggest show we’ve ever done, does a man with a million pounds have more than a man with zero pounds? DyaknowwhatImean? Because the biggest show I’ve ever done is in here, and I’m pointing to my heart, dyaknowwhatImean? But yeah, it probably is the biggest show we’ve ever done because it’s two nights in a row and we’ve sold out.
It’s hard to measure because technically when you’re a radio station you could be playing to 10,000 people.
Very true, we usually get about 20 missed calls but who knows who we’re playing to? What is the population in Brentford area, is it 250,000? A lot of people don’t have phones anymore because of the internet, they’re taking phones down.
And it can give you brain cancer.
How did you choose the other acts who appear at your shows?
Just our mates really.
Or fans. They’re fans.
A lot of MCs are fans of mine because I’ve subconsciously inspired them, dyaknowhatimean? A lot of them won’t admit it but I know deep down that when they look at me with a blank expression, there’s a glint in their eye and within that glint in their eye is ‘thank you for saving me from old life and bringing me up as an MC even though I’ve never met you.’ And I look back and nod and in that nod is ‘you’re welcome and thank you very much for appreciating it.’
Grindah is really good at body language. He can read a lot.
That’s all within two seconds’ interaction, just passing him, he will get all of that from that.
Gets his whole backstory.
Also, you can call them a lot. I’d say eight missed calls is the cutoff.
Yeah, keep calling them.
Up to eight and then leave it.
I’ve got an automation service so it just keeps on ringing, 20, 30 times until they pick up.
Then they’re like, ‘Alright I’ll do it if you shut up.’
Yeah, I’ve been threatened with legal action before but that’s just part of negotiation.
That’s what you want from a manager though.
Yeah I’ve got no shame.
Lawyer up!
How long have you been their manager?
How long, two years? Three years?
Well there was a point when we needed money for the studio and we thought ‘how do we get money for studio without spending all my Avirex money?’ Get a manager.
I had to do a bit of money laundering. But in a legal way, so I got a bit of cash and I thought ‘put it in the boys.’
He said it’s a tax write off or something.
You told us not to pay tax ever, that it’s a myth.
Yeah, yeah tax is a myth.
Everything cash.
And gold.
Are you lot paying cash?
No
Are we getting paid for this?
No
Why are we doing this then? Oh, promotion, right. The thing is the music speaks for itself really. If you basically get the fucking compilation, listen to the single, watch the video, and buy all the merch.
There’s a type of promotion called wordamouth, which is, I think it’s a Japanese saying or something, wordamouth. That’s the best way that it spreads around, you can pay for promotion but this thing called wordamouth--
Yeah, wadamout--
I think I’m mispronouncing it or something. And it just spreads.
What’s the video about?
It’s a bit of a conceptual they call it where we dress up in our best clothes and go down to an estate that we don’t even live on and start MCing at the camera. It’s a bit like ‘ok?’ It’s a bit weird, left field, but once you watch it you get it because what I’m actually doing is MCing at the camera and then you’re hearing the lyrics and you see us at the same time.
Which has never been done before.
Because usually they make it seem like a little film or something but not us, we’re taking it back to where it started. We didn’t really start on that estate, we’re taking it back to where someone else started probably. We’ve got a dog as well and we’ve got a scene where it looks like I’m getting jacked but really we beat the shit out of him to show that you’re hard. And Chabuds beat the shit out of him too.
That was real someone tried to jack his phone.
Nah, that was all staged.
*shushes Grindah*
Oh, yeah, sometime tried it obviously.
I faced him like ‘mate, I’m a big geezer but I’ve got very good sprint speed.’
But I was like ‘I’ll do it, truss me’ and you were like ‘no don’t Grindah, you’ve got a lot more to lose than me’ because I was gonna do it weren’t I? I was going nuts.
But he delegated to me, you know I’ve got a bit of jungle jiu-jitsu so I chased him down and it was definitely real. Because it looks like I was quite far away from him when I was chasing him, but I cut a corner and then I got him.
Even when you’re on top of him, he did look a bit scared, but once he saw me walk over that’s when you could see the real fear in his eyes.
I could smell piss. He started nervously farting a lot.
We was out by then, we ducked out and carried on MCing. So just a day in the life really, don’t fuck with Kurupt FM.
Kurupt FM’s “The Lost Tapes” is out on XL Records from November 17.
What are your plans for the future?
Just to blaze a lot more really, get the blazing up.
More tunes, more videos, probably come down with a seminal album piece and all that, you never even know with us.
We might drop a trilogy album.
I might drop an album exactly the same day, one’s night, one’s day dyaknowwhatImean? One’s a black cover, one’s a white cover.
That’s sick.
